What are deviations from social norms? Sometimes they are wrong, and sometimes they highlight inequality and prejudice in society. Social norms are the unwritten rules that guide expectations and actions to ensure harmonious and predictable behavior within society (Unicef).
These rules may be the opposite of what they were intended to do. My own OCD, anxiety, and depression, which arose from an abusive childhood, can present themselves in many ways that make others feel at odds. Why? Because my behaviors don’t quite fit the typical social mold. Do social norms explain neurodiversity? Do we all abide by social norms, or do we each have quirks and eccentricities?
Social norms facilitate social interactions and help people navigate their social environments effectively. However, they can also perpetuate inequalities and may need to be challenged and changed over time.
Social norms are often based on the behaviors and expectations of the neurotypical majority. However, there is growing awareness and efforts to take neurodiversity into account. Social norms have also guided psychological assessments. By analyzing how people may deviate from accepted standards of behavior, mental health experts can determine the emotional and cognitive characteristics that distinguish psychological conditions such as phobias, depression, and others.
Several broad categories of social norms influence different aspects of our lives:
Situational rules They vary depending on the situation or setting. For example, speaking quietly in a library, cheering loudly at a sporting event, and behaving formally at a wedding or funeral are all examples.
Popular customs These are informal norms or everyday customs that can be broken without serious consequences. Examples include dressing appropriately for different occasions, good table manners, greeting others, and waiting in line.
Traditions These are firmly established norms that have moral and ethical implications. Deviations from them have serious consequences and disapproval. Examples include honesty, fidelity in marriage, respect for elders, and not stealing or cheating.
Laws These are formal codes of conduct with legal penalties drawn up and enforced by government agencies. Examples include speed limits, laws against theft, assault and drug use, rules on business practices and environmental laws.
Taboos These are forbidden behaviors that are so deeply ingrained in a culture that even thinking about violating them is repulsive. Examples include incest, cannibalism, and desecration of sacred symbols or places.
Conventions They facilitate interactions with convenience and social coordination, but do not carry significant moral weight. Examples include shaking hands when meeting someone, being polite, and having dress codes in specific social settings.
Cultural norms They are specific to a particular culture. Examples include bowing as a greeting in Japan, removing shoes before entering a home in many Asian cultures, and specific dietary restrictions in various religious practices.
Group rules They apply to specific groups, such as organizations, clubs, or subcultures. For example, behavioral expectations may be found in sports teams, and rituals may be observed in fraternities or sororities.
Gender norms They relate to behaviors and roles traditionally associated with a particular gender. For example, men should be stoic and women should be affectionate and have hobbies or careers specific to their gender.
Age standards These are behaviors that are expected of a person based on their age. For example, people are expected to go to school in childhood, start a career in early adulthood, and retire in old age.
Deviations from social norms
A deviation from social norms occurs when an individual’s behavior, actions, or beliefs differ significantly from the commonly accepted standards and expectations in a given society. It often leads to misinterpretation. For example, if you avoid eye contact, this could be misinterpreted as dishonesty or disinterest.
Other examples of deviations from social norms include wearing clothing, hairstyles, piercings, or makeup that is considered unusual or inappropriate for certain occasions, breaking social etiquette, defying gender roles, not having children, living off the grid, expressing unpopular opinions, unconventional artistic expression, dieting in ways that are unconventional, hobbies or interests that are not commonly understood by everyone, or promoting a cause.
These deviations can provoke various reactions in society. Below are some other ways in which deviations have adverse consequences:
- Social isolation: People are excluded or marginalized by their communities or peers.
- Criticism and stigma: Nonconformity can attract judgment from others, which can potentially lead to negative labels and discrimination.
- Legal and institutional consequences are whether the rules are codified in laws or institutional policies.
- Personal and professional risksWorking in environments that strongly enforce conformity can pose risks to career, relationships, and personal safety.
Deviations are not all bad: they can cause revolutions and lead to innovation.
- Innovation and progress: Breaking away from the norms opens up new avenues, challenges the status quo and broadens horizons with unconventional thinking. That’s why fashion is constantly changing, cars can drive themselves and awareness can be spread about issues that need reform.
- Personal growth: People develop a stronger sense of identity and purpose to foster self-development.
- Social change: Deviating from social norms can lead to important social changes and reforms, promoting greater equality, justice and inclusion.
- Inspiration for others Thinking differently and embracing unique qualities, paving the way for a diverse and tolerant society.
If you’re struggling to find your place in a society that promotes conformity, here are some ways to cope:
- Finding supportive communities It can reduce feelings of isolation.
- Building resilience It can help manage criticism and negative comments.
- Defense and education Efforts in these areas can help reduce the stigma associated with nonconformity, raise awareness about diversity and neurodiversity, and promote inclusion.
- Balance The need to stay true to oneself and navigate societal expectations can help reduce some of the negative impacts while promoting personal authenticity.
Ways we can accept deviations from social norms
There are many ways to start redefining social norms and celebrating deviance and neurodiversity. Here are a few:
- Inclusive practices:
- Adaptations:Schools, workplaces and public spaces are increasingly making adaptations, such as providing sensory-friendly environments, flexible communication methods and alternative working arrangements.
- Policy changes:Laws and policies are beginning to change to protect the rights of neurodiverse people and ensure they have equal opportunities.
- Cultural changes:
- Redefining the rules Be more inclusive and recognize that diverse ways of thinking and behaving can benefit society.
- Empathy and flexibility In social interactions, neurodiversity is helped to be accommodated. People are encouraged to be more patient and understanding of differences.
- Inclusive standards:
- Communication:open to different communication styles, such as non-verbal communication or the need for clear and direct language.
- Social interactions:Be understanding of those who may have difficulty with eye contact, social cues, or small talk.
- Work and education:Offer quiet workspaces, flexible deadlines and alternative learning methods to support those who need them.
Conclusion
While deviations from social norms are often challenging, they can have both positive and negative consequences. Social norms help create predictable behavior and facilitate interactions, but they can also perpetuate inequalities and marginalize those who do not conform to them. Understanding these deviations requires recognizing the different types of norms and their influence.
Those who deviate may face social isolation, criticism, and legal consequences, but they can also drive innovation, personal growth, and social change. Supportive communities, building resilience, and advocating for rights are essential to mitigating negative impacts. Adopting inclusive practices and cultural shifts promotes empathy and understanding, fostering a more diverse and tolerant society. Reframing norms to be more inclusive benefits everyone, allowing people to thrive and contribute to the richness of our collective human experience.
How to accept deviations from social norms?
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